Interlude 2: Elsewhere in Paradox Space

Source material: Worm, Interlude 2

Originally blogged: April 1, 2017


Oh hey, looks like that was the end of Insinuation! Makes sense; that wham line at the end of the previous chapter is a pretty good thing to end the arc with.

[At this point of the liveblog, I considered the Interludes Arcless bridges between the Arcs. People eventually convinced me otherwise, so please bear with past me for now.]

So we’re heading into another interlude, as I sort of expected would happen when the arc ended. I wonder, will it continue what Interlude 1 started by having a different perspective character? And if so, who will it be? I’ve previously suggested a few candidates – one of the Undersiders, their mysterious “boss” or even one of the antagonists – Bakuda, Oni Lee or even Rottendick, uh, I mean, Lung.

I guess all I can do is read and find out!


AN:

An author’s note? We haven’t had one of those since 1.1, when it warned about potentially triggering content.

AN: Special fangz (get it, coz Im goffik) 2 my gf (ew not in that way) raven, bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da story and spelling. U rok! Justin ur da luv of my deprzzing life u rok 2! MCR ROX!

Oh wow. With the quality of the story and writing so far, I would not have expected Wildbow to write like this. I guess this “Raven” person does a really good job.

Hi my name is Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way

New character! Wow, and we’re getting her name immediately, that’s new.

and I have long ebony black hair (that’s how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears

Can’t deny it, this new character sounds cool-looking so far.

and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee (AN: if u don’t know who she is get da hell out of here!).

Isn’t that the singer in Evanescence?

Well, she does have “icy blue eyes”.


I’m not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he’s a major fucking hottie.

Uh, okay? I hope you mean that you wish you shared some of those “major fucking hottie” genes.

I guess Ebony might share some of the self-image issues we’ve seen in Taylor.

I’m a vampire

Woah! We’re involving vampires in the story now? As in, like, actual fantasy vampires? Or is this just shorthand for “I’m a parahuman with powers that resemble those of a fantasy vampire”? I’m going with that theory for now.

but my teeth are straight and white.

Handy for keeping up a secret identity.

I have pale white skin.

This… not so much.


I’m also a witch,

Wow, how many powers do you have? I know Lung had a lot, but at least his were thematically coherent.

I guess you could argue that Ebony’s powerset is themed around the fantasy genre.

Anyway, what kind of role is Ebony going to have in this story? Vampire and witch powers both sound villainous, but so does Taylor’s power, so that doesn’t prove anything. Still, what if Ebony is the Undersiders’ mysterious boss?

and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England where I’m in the seventh year (I’m seventeen).

…oh wow, we’re not in Brockton Bay anymore, Toto. We’re not even in the U.S. – if Ebony is the boss, she works from abroad. Though that’s seeming less likely with the reveal that she’s only a couple years older than Taylor.

The name Hogwarts sounds vaguely familiar, but I can’t seem to place it.

I’m a goth (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly black.

It took us quite a few chapters to get there, but we found a character who’s actually a goth.

I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there.

Including your hero/villain outfit? Also, I’m surprised to see Wildbow endorsing a real life chain of stores like this.

For example today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow.

That’s a lot of black, but she did warn us about that.


I was walking outside Hogwarts. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about.

Snowing and raining at the same time? Ew, you’re gonna get slush on the ground. I like snow, but when it mixes with rain like that, it’s not very nice.

Also, I guess Ebony has a weakness to the sunlight because of her vampire powers. I wonder how common that kind of thing is. Taylor should stay away from fly-swatters, just in case.

A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.

Ooh, conflict. It seems there’s a category of people at Hogwarts called “preps”. What exactly does that entail?

“Hey Ebony!” shouted a voice. I looked up. It was…. Draco Malfoy!

Oh hey, another new character. “Draco” is an unusual name. Then again, Ebony and Taylor aren’t exactly all that common either, I think.

“What’s up Draco?” I asked.

“Nothing.” he said shyly.

But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away.

Well that was a short conversation. Apparently Draco is a rather shy guy. I hope to learn more about him later.

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AN: IS it good? PLZ tell me fangz!

Wait, what? Was that it? No, wait, there’s more after the author’s notes.

I will admit that so far, this chapter isn’t as good as some of the others, but it hasn’t really had time to show its worth yet.


AN: Fangz 2 bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da chapta! BTW preps stop flaming ma story ok!

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Another author’s note immediately after the previous one? Okay then.

It’s kind of strange, though. So many chapters without author’s notes, and then multiple in this one? There’s been like four so far!

Also it seems Wildbow doesn’t like “preps” either. If they were flaming the story, I can understand that.

The next day I woke up in my bedroom. It was snowing and raining again.

I mean consistent weather is nice but does it have to be slush?

I opened the door of my coffin and drank some blood from a bottle I had.

Wait, what? She actually sleeps in a coffin and drinks blood? Are these things the vampire powerset actually require of her, or is she just crazy and/or caught up in an elaborate roleplaying scenario?

My coffin was black ebony and inside it was hot pink velvet with black lace on the ends.

Sounds… cozy?

I got out of my coffin and took of my giant MCR t-shirt which I used for pajamas. Instead, I put on a black leather dress, a pentagram necklace, combat boots and black fishnets on. I put on four pairs of earrings in my pierced ears, and put my hair in a kind of messy bun.

That’s quite an outfit you’ve got there. I do like the messy bun hairstyle, though.

My friend, Willow (AN: Raven dis is u!) woke up then and grinned at me.

Huh. At least try to be subtle when you insert your friends into the story!

She flipped her long waist-length raven black hair with pink streaks and opened her forest-green eyes. She put on her Marilyn Manson t-shirt with a black mini, fishnets and pointy high-heeled boots. We put on our makeup (black lipstick white foundation and black eyeliner.)

It’s nice that Ebony has friends who share her interests.


“OMFG, I saw you talking to Draco Malfoy yesterday!” she said excitedly.

“Yeah? So?” I said, blushing.

oooooooohhh romance

“Do you like Draco?” she asked as we went out of the Slytherin common room and into the Great Hall.

“No I so fucking don’t!” I shouted.

“Yeah right!” she exclaimed. Just then, Draco walked up to me.

Foot, meet mouth.

Also, Slytherin? Does this school have multiple named common rooms? I guess it’s gotta be rather large to warrant that.

The name sounds slightly familiar. Maybe Hogwarts and Slytherin are references to something I don’t remember?

“Hi.” he said.

“Hi.” I replied flirtily.

I love how coddamn obvious Ebony is being here.

“NO I SO FUCKING DON’T!” *slobbers all over Draco*

“Guess what.” he said.

“What?” I asked.

“Well, Good Charlotte are having a concert in Hogsmeade.” he told me.

I guess Hogsmeade is the city this school is in.

But yeah, still wondering what this has to do with the story proper. I guess I’ll find out in time.

“Oh. My. Fucking. God!” I screamed. I love GC. They are my favorite band, besides MCR.

“Well…. do you want to go with me?” he asked.

I gasped.

Wooo!

This romance subplot is progressing rather quickly, compared to every other subplot in the story so far, but I’m not going to complain.


(trigger warning for self harm)

AN: STOP FLAMMING DA STORY PREPZ OK! odderwize fangs 2 da goffik ppl 4 da good reveiws! FANGS AGEN RAVEN! oh yeah, BTW I don’t own dis or da lyrics 4 Good Chralotte.

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Another author’s note? And he’s repeating himself – Raven is getting a lot of “fangz” in this chapter!

Sounds like we’re in for actually hearing something from the concert.

On the night of the concert I put on my black lace-up boots with high heels. Underneath them were ripped red fishnets. Then I put on a black leather minidress with all this corset stuff on the back and front. I put on matching fishnet on my arms. I straightened my hair and made it look all spiky.

I liked the messy bun better, but spiky’s cool too.

I felt a little depressed then, so I slit one of my wrists.

WHOA what the fuck

Welp, at least her powers might include a healing factor.

I read a depressing book while I waited for it to stop bleeding and I listened to some GC.

That’s

very casual

okay


I painted my nails black and put on TONS of black eyeliner. Then I put on some black lipstick. I didn’t put on foundation because I was pale anyway. I drank some human blood so I was ready to go to the concert.

Where exactly does she get the blood anyway?

…Hot Topic?

I went outside. Draco was waiting there in front of his flying car.

I guess Draco has the power to make cars fly. Not the most subtle of parahuman powers.

He was wearing a Simple Plan t-shirt (they would play at the show too), baggy black skater pants, black nail polish and a little eyeliner (AN: A lot fo kewl boiz wer it ok!).

Good Charlotte and Simple Plan? Sounds like these two are in for some fun.

“Hi Draco!” I said in a depressed voice.

That’s some of the least depressed-sounding punctuation you could use, but okay. Maybe it’s symbolic of how depression isn’t always outwardly obvious and a “depressed voice” can sound excited? Well done, Wildbow.

“Hi Ebony.” he said back. We walked into his flying black Mercedes-Benz (the license plate said 666) and flew to the place with the concert.

Wow, I’m sure that custom license plate number is in high demand. Good on you for getting it, Draco!

On the way we listened excitedly to Good Charlotte and Marilyn Manson. We both smoked cigarettes and drugs.

These two don’t seem to be on the side of the law, but they don’t exactly seem villainous either. Just… delinquents. I’m still not sure what they have to do with anything.

When we got there, we both hopped out of the car.

I hope you landed it first!


We went to the mosh pit at the front of the stage and jumped up and down as we listened to Good Charlotte.

“You come in cold, you’re covered in blood
They’re all so happy you’ve arrived
The doctor cuts your cord, hands you to your mom
She sets you free into this life.” sang Joel (I don’t own da lyrics 2 dat song).

Beautiful.

Also, good to see that Wildbow respects copyright law by throwing in another disclaimer.

“Joel is so fucking hot.” I said to Draco, pointing to him as he sung, filling the club with his amazing voice.

Suddenly Draco looked sad.

Aww, poor thing.

“What’s wrong?” I asked as we moshed to the music. Then I caught on.

“Hey, it’s ok I don’t like him better than YOU!” I said.

“Really?” asked Draco sensitively and he put his arm around me all protective.

“Really.” I said.

What a sweet moment.

“Besides I don’t even know Joel and he’s going out with Hilary fucking Duff. I fucking hate that little bitch.” I said disgustedly, thinking of her ugly blonde face.

Aaand it’s ruined.


The night went on really well, and I had a great time. So did Draco. After the concert, we drank some beer and asked Benji and Joel for their autographs and photos with them. We got GC concert tees. Draco and I crawled back into the Mercedes-Benz, but Draco didn’t go back into Hogwarts, instead he drove the car into……………………… the Forbidden Forest!

Oh shit, that sounds scary!


End of Interlude 2

And that seems to be the end of the Interlude. That’s odd, I hadn’t expected an interlude to end on a cliffhanger. I guess maybe we’re picking this back up in Interlude 3? Or maybe Taylor somehow ends up going to England and meeting these characters in the Forbidden Forest? That seems a little contrived, but I still have no clue how else these characters are connected to the overall story. This isn’t the first thing I’ve read with an interlude/intermission that seems entirely disconnected from the main story and becomes important later, though, so I’m sure I’ll find out eventually.

As for quality, I feel like the writing wasn’t quite as good as usual in this chapter. Maybe Raven wasn’t at her best the day she did the editing of this chapter. Still, she did a good job compared to how Wildbow apparently writes without editing.

I think I’ll refrain from speculating on the next arc until we get there. With that in mind, I only have one thing left to say:

April Fool’s! ;D


So for anyone who didn’t know, the text I was blogging about for April Fool’s Day (in place of Interlude 2 of Worm) was in fact the first three chapters of My Immortal, a Harry Potter fic (allegedly) that is commonly cited as the worst fanfic ever.

If you’re about to click that link, be warned that too many trigger warnings to list apply, and none of those potentially triggering topics are treated with due respect.

This was not a blind liveblog of the fic. I am one of those madmen who have read all 44 chapters of My Immortal and thoroughly enjoyed the ride. No, I don’t think it’s good – it’s just so bad it’s hilarious, especially if you take everything literally as written.

[Fun fact: I’m pretty sure I ended it where I did mainly because chapter four had Tara Gilesbie’s idea of a sex scene. It’s amazingly ridiculous, but I didn’t want to cover it on the blog.]

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